We Interrupt Our Christmasy Niceness For This... Thing

Today I tried to find out whether or not I had a dark/sick/twisted sense of humor. I really did. I found a really stupid online quiz that told me absolutely nothing... Oh, just read the post.

Chief Ten Bears

1) Chief Ten Bears of Dances With Wolves fame died.
What we may not have known about Ten Bears, aka Floyd Red Crow Westerman (unless we are rampant fans of "Walker, Texas Ranger" or "Dharma & Greg"), is that he was quite a prolific actor and showed up in freaking everything.

While I have the utmost respect for the man and sympathy for his family, if I see one more Comcast News headline that says, "Dances With Wolves actor dies" or "Walker, Texas Ranger actor dies" or "Dharma & Greg actor dies," I'm gonna get out my fork gun and do some serious damage. Every time I see one of these headlines, I'm all aghast. "Holy crap, who are all these actors dying?" So I click on it and wouldn't you know... it's always Floyd. It's like the boy who cried "Ten Bears Died!"

2) This is what I get for griping:
Now Dan Fogelberg died. It's all because of me, and Elasticwaistband Lady, because she made fun of his tank top and hairy armpits. Way to go.

3) Hope I'm not spoiling anything...
...but Todd the Jolly Rancher won the $1,000,000 on "Survivor: China." I called that one (but I really hoped James the Grave Digger would win).

Chief Ten Bears

4) Ten Bears died.
(Just making sure you're aware.)

5) Jen Lindley is still dead.
Let's all sing along with this charming Irish ditty: "Everywhere we looked, there was death, death, death..."

6) Death is everywhere. There are flies on the windscreen.
Come here. Kiss me. Now.

7) This really doesn't have anything to do with anything...
... but William H. Macy is still gonna kick your butt. You just watch yourself. He has the death sentence on twelve systems. "I'll be careful." You'll be DEAD!

8. This Chinese music on the "Survivor" finale is leaving me cold.
Flute? Weird wailing? Drums that make absolutely no sense? I'm SO not Chinese. You'd think that after all my years of genealogical research, this would have been obvious before now.

Chief Ten Bears

9) And just in case you were thinking of forgetting...
Ten Bears is still dead.

"Shu-mani-tu-tonka Ob' Wa-chi! Do you see that Ten Bears is dead! Will you bring the funeral potatoes to the stake center for the dinner! Shu-mani-tu-tonka Ob' Wa-chi! Do you see that we still need ham and a salad and the homemade rolls! Do you see that no one has set up the tables in the multi-purpose room! Shu-mani-tu-tonka Ob' Wa-chi!!!!!....."