Dear Lungs,

I never fully appreciate you till you're messed up. 

Hackingly yours,
Nat

(Also today: I tried taking an online test to see if I have attention deficit disorder, but got distracted by something else.)

First World Problems

We awoke this morning and did our usual "bribe Harrison with doughnuts from Safeway so he'll be on time to early morning Seminary", only to find that our usual Safeway doughnut lady QUIT. *anxiety* 

I went to the bakery and there were NO DOUGHNUTS. I had to buy muffins instead. MUFFINS. Harrison said, "What if they don't have doughnuts tomorrow either?" My poor tender guy.

I can't believe she did this. Where are her priorities? 

And about those muffins - I ate an almond poppy seed muffin, which sounded like a marvelous idea until it became clear that Doughnut Lady (who was obviously suffering and on the verge of a doughnut related breakdown) must have spilled the entire bottle of almond extract into the batter. And now, YIKES. My mouth tastes like an almond flavored moonshine still.

Later:
Watching Monsters Inc. with Roz, and enjoying her impression of Roz the monster. 

Went to a friend's funeral today.

Read Dave's obituary here.

Happy Veterans Day

Last night I dreamed that Marvin Gaye was in my ward choir and man, was that guy a flirt.

2:06 PM: Listening to the wind whistle outside... The cat has been parked in front of the window most of the day, watching and enjoying the mayhem. Earlier I watched some surprised sounding geese fly west, doing about 80 mph. Fun storm so far. 

Later: Just drove home amidst uprooted trees, taped off streets, total darkness, and debris everywhere. Be safe and stay warm, everyone... 

So tired.

Hello, Tri-Cities*

But first: It was "mitch match" day at school today.

Melanie texted me this morning, asking if I was going to Neenaw's birthday party in Boise this weekend. I texted back, "What birthday party?"

I texted John and Karen. "So I hear you guys are having a birthday party for Neenaw this weekend." They texted back, "What birthday party?"

Long story short: A party ended up happening, and Ernie and I decided to head to John and Karen's. We drove as far as his house in Richland tonight and are spending the night at his house, and stopping to see Mom in Pendleton tomorrow, and heading to Boise after that.

*sigh* Family.

Also, note to self: The kids keep staring. Apparently I took too long between hair dye jobs.

*Feel free to imagine me saying this in Jerry Seinfeld's "Hello, Newman" voice.

This is the best thing I've ever SEEN.

POT'S LEGAL IN OREGON! OH MY FREAKING HOLY CRAP

Meh, it's been legal in Washington for two years. 

For what it's worth: The decriminalization of marijuana here hasn't changed my life much, except to give me more opportunity to laugh at the bungling of state legislators who clearly had no idea how to handle this new wrinkle. As my law enforcing husband says, better to recriminalize alcohol than criminalize pot - statistically, alcohol ruins more lives. As a Mormon, I don't use either one and am grateful for my beliefs. They hold more sway on my decisions than whatever goofball thing the general population decides.  

Well I NEVER

Was just honked at and flipped off a few minutes ago, because I wouldn't turn left into oncoming traffic. Oops, my bad!  Stay classy, Vantucky!

*cough* Harrison *cough*

The child who conducted tonight's FHE insisted on being called Swag Daddy.

So, good news

Cut down my first tree today. I am woman, see me chainsaw. ROWWWRRR

Halloween 2014

Had a little trauma today at school. Apparently Roz put on her costume for the afternoon party and she said some kids were kind of giving her the stink eye about her costume. They didn't say anything, they just "looked at her funny" and Rosalind figured it was because her costume wasn't girly. Like ninjas can't be girls?

So after we came home from school, we went upstairs and she desperately searched for some princess-y thing that would fit, but upon finding nothing, I tried to convince her that her ninja costume is wonderful and that girls can be ninjas. That was not enough to persuade her, but this video was:


So we got busy, and voila:

I French braided her hair, thus:

That'll work

And she was very, very happy. Whew!!

Beautiful ninja baby

The adult children and Harrison were of course not that interested, Carter went with Ethan and Tyson to trick-or-treat, so it was just Roz who went. Kind of lonesome, awww.

I stayed home and passed out candy. We didn't have as many trick-or-treaters as last year. I decided that at 8:30, the lights go off and the chocolate is mine. All in favor say AYE.

Our attempted Jack o'lanterns

Her costume must have worked, because she made quite a haul and was very pleased.

Ann P played this as a piano solo today.

Cue Nat bawling and sniffling, accompanied by Sandy P.

Ugh.

Had to have the "Some boys are icky" talk with Rozzie today. Sorry to burst your bubble, baby.

One of our ward members, Gemia C, had to call our school librarian about some issues of National Geographic magazine in the school library, and some boys finding some pictures and making wildly inappropriate remarks to her daughter. SECOND GRADE. Sickening. 

I told her, if any boy says ANYTHING remotely gross to her, she needs to tell me so I can go kick his disgusting little punk ____. And tell him that her dad has a gun. :)

I may have hammered it home a little too well. She kept changing the subject.

I've found that there are some things you don't ever think you'll have to say to your kids, like "If you find a National Geographic magazine in the library at school, with certain pictures inside, DO NOT head to the nearest girl and make body-related comments." You would hope this would be a given, but apparently not. 

More than anything I wanted to give her a sense of "This is NOT okay, and your parents and teachers are your advocates. No one gets to talk to you this way without consequences."

Just this morning I was thinking that it would be so great if medical intervention was available for people who make really, really stupid choices.Like a shot or a pill or something. "Here, take this. It'll cure your stupid."

After school I asked her if any of the boys were ICKY today...she heaved a big disgusted sigh and said, "noooooo." Whew!

Try to Avoid Any Virgos or Leos ....

Ebola is the big snit the general public is currently in.

(I know there's a better grammatical way of saying this, as there must be with pretty much everything I write here)

(But that's what I like to call "too dang bad")

I like capturing this kind of thing for genealogical purposes.

Harrison enjoyed this joke to the utmost when I told it the first time, and then told it to his friends,

so that was awesome.

Having an amazing Sunday. Hope you all are as well.

Two chicken tacos later = bliss

#eatingmyfeelings

Unwinding after a particularly nasty afternoon of soccer momming. The kids on the other team playing Carter's team were absolute HOLES. Kristy and Steve are visiting for Hubby's birthday and I think I embarrassed them with my angry mom-shouting. Barbara P was in on it too. Why do people have to teach their kids to be absolute HOLES?

Perhaps this Voodoo doughnut will assuage my guilt... the Old Dirty Bastige* is always good for what ails me.

Later: this song always makes me have the happy warmies. 




*Someone on Facebook admonished me with her hope that it was a G-rated doughnut. As if.

It was a good birthday.

Kristy, Hubby, Carter, Bella, Harrison
Utah-Oregon Game

It was good on TV, too

Happy Birthday to that cute funny boy I married. Best husband ever.

Carter's Last Flag Football Game

It was a good one!

Found in Long Beach, WA, on a day trip with Dad and Neenaw.
Boy did it sum up that day :)

Also: I am majorly feeling the love for this song lately. The love is RIGHT HERE.

A Reminder

Eyebrow selfie.
Like the sparkle on my phone?
Nail polish, courtesy of  Roz